


Baby Of Mine.

by Tony Stark Of Midgard (CallmeIronman)



Category: The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: Baby Fluff, Character death-mot major, Dark!Loki, Depression, M/M, Mpreg, Sad, Violence, post partum depression, temporary insanity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-10
Updated: 2015-10-10
Packaged: 2018-04-22 14:02:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4837922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CallmeIronman/pseuds/Tony%20Stark%20Of%20Midgard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It wasn't that Loki didn't want to love his baby.... He just didn't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Baby Of Mine.

**Author's Note:**

> All the information I have on ppd is From my mothers experience with my baby sister. Please don't judge my work by that. If there is any thing you would like added to my description of ppd then feel free to tell me.
> 
> mamma elskar þig kærust
> 
> Mommy loves you dearest.
> 
>  
> 
> taka andann burt Stark. 
> 
> Take the demon away stark.
> 
>  
> 
> þú varst aldrei ætlað að lifa
> 
> You wee never meant to live.
> 
> Fyrirgefðu, ég elska þig, ekki gráta, það er allt í lagi. Fyrirgefðu sonur minn. Daivin minn.
> 
> I'm sorry, I love you, do not cry, it's okay. Forgive me my son. My Daivin
> 
> Àdar Father
> 
> Ada daddy.

When Loki told Tony that he was pregnant Tony was overjoyed. He quickly pulled Loki into baby planing mode, clearing spaces for the baby in every room in the house. Loki was relieved that Tony was so enthused about the baby, he had worried that it would be tossed to the street him along with it.

 

When they found out the baby was a boy, Loki nearly cried. A son to cherish. that's when they found the second baby.

 

"twins?" Tony choked on the word. Loki nodded smiling.

 

"two boys." Tony had dropped to his knees placing feathery kisses on Loki's barely there bump. 

 

" my baby boys." He said adoringly. " my sweet baby boys" Loki remembered the adoration in Tony's eyes as he looked up at his lover. The moment was perfect.

 

but that was then.

 

When Loki gave birth dr. Banner delivered the children In a SHIELD medical bay. As banner checked the babies, Loki knew from the look in his eye that there was something wrong. 

 

"What is it." He had croaked out. Banner didn't answer, but he whispered something that make Tony cover his eyes. Loki had seen the sobs wracking Tony's shoulders, the comforting hand Thor placed on his shoulder. Loki suddenly knew what had happened. 

 

one of the babies was gone.

 

"let me hold him." Loki whispered. Banner placed the baby gently in Loki's arms. The child's skin was cool and soft, someone had cleaned him. Loki placed a soft kiss on the baby's forehead feeling hot tears drop into the skin

 

"mamma elskar þig kærust"  He whispered before closing his eyes. He he heard someone call his name and the baby was taken Before everything went dark.

 

 After a four-day medically induced coma, Loki saw his living child for the first time. He saw Tony first, his husband explained that the second boy was stable and well enough to be seen. 

 

"What of the other child" Loki winced at his own words "what of Daryl?" Tony's mouth quirked up.

 

"Daryl is.. Safe." Loki leaned back on his pillows too tired to think about what that meant. Daryl's shell was already on his way To the funeral home, to be cremated as per agreement.

 

"bring the baby Stark." Loki said tiredly. Tony came back minutes later holding a green threaded blanket in his arms. He passed Loki the child gently.

 

 

"hello child" Loki said in a emotionless monotone. The child's face was partially hidden by a blanket, though he was gorgeous from what Loki could see. Chocolate colored hair and bright green eyes with that odd burst of yellow in the center Tony's eyes held and a ring of red on the outside. His creamy skin was an even balance between his two fathers with a slight tinge of blue, tribute to his frost giant heritage no doubt. 

Yet while was beautiful, Loki felt no love towards him. Instead, he felt longing for his lost son, and disgust for this child. 

 

"taka andann burt Stark." Loki said closing his eyes. Stark did as he was asked, allowing Loki to roll away from him and cover his head with a blanket. 

 

"It's okay buddy, Ada will come along." Tony said bouncing tha child as he walked form the room. "No one can resist a baby like you."

 

And he was right. When the other avengers saw the child, even Natasha the cold hearted spy could not help loving him. 

 

 

"Hello little guy." She said wiggling the little hand on her finger. "I'm your auntie Tasha." The baby cooed waving his little fists at the spy.

 

"God he's pretty, look at that eye " Steve said poking the babe lightly in the cheek.  Tony pushed Steve gently before handing the baby to Bucky. 

 

"No Stark, I dont wanna." Bucky was still treating everyone like glass after what he did to Steve. Tony had none of it. 

 

"bullshit" 

 

"language stark"

 

"sorry sorry," Tony Placed the child gently in the cradle of Bucky's flesh arm. Astonished, Bucky gently rocked the child.

 

"He's beautiful." Bucky said softly staring at the baby's technicolored eyes. What Loki had been appaled by, the team found astonishing. The baby started to cry when uncle Thor held him.

 

"just like his Àdar!" Thor laughed passing The baby back to Tony. "all the love in the world for Stark, and no affection for me!" The baby reached over and tugged a loose strands of Thor's hair into his mouth.  amused outrage ran through the gathered members.

 

"you're gonna get hair bleach in your mouth Day-Day." Clint said. Tony looked afrontedly and Barton.

 

"my son's name is Daivin, don't call him Day-Day." Clint laughed.

 

"whatever" 

 

The festivity broke up when Daivin fell asleep. Steve planted a sloppy kiss on Tony's forehead as they left, Bucky threw Tony an apologetic glance. 

 

"That was fun huh? Meet the old family." Tony spoke softly to Daivin, rocking him gently in his arms.

 

"Stark" Tony looked up to see Loki fully dressed and groomed. "We were cleared to go home." Tony nodded.

 

"let me get Daivin dressed." Loki ignored the mention of his son. Loki continued to ignore both son and father the rest of the trip home. 

* 

The first incident happened on Daivin's four month birthday.

"Loki" Tony called  "Grab Daivin from the bed, would you? we're going out." Loki rolled his eyes. The damned child wasn't even a year old and they were already spending money on it. 

 

"of courge Anthony" he called, his voice falsely cheery. He walked into their shared bedroom to get the child. The baby laying on the bed gurgled to signal his pleasure at Loki's arrival. Loki nodded as if the baby understood. 

 

"Child." Loki said attempting to pick the baby up. Daivin kicked his feet hitting Loki's arm. Loki growled at the baby trying again to grasp his fat middle.

 

"stay still heathen!" Loki snarled. Daivin kicked, this time hitting Loki in the face. A garbled curse left Loki's lips as he touched his throbbing cheek. His eyes turned hard.

 

"Fine brat" he said pushing the baby off of the bed. Only when he heard a piercing shriek did he gather the baby into his arms. 

"Loki what happened?!" Stark thundered into the room searching for his son. Loki handed the baby to his father. 

 

"He rolled off the bed, but he's fine" Tony's concerned expression angered Loki. Why does he care so much about the lump? It does nothing but whine and scream all damned day.

 

"Let's go." Loki said gathering the dropped diaper bag and rushing out the door.

 

*

 

The second and final incident happened while Tony was at work. Loki was sitting opposite of Daivin on the floor in the living room. The baby was now eight months old and starting to talk, Tony was terribly impressed, Loki thought the child sounded like it was drowning. Loki had continually thought of before the bloody child was born for eight months solid. He had been so happy for the pregnancy, but losing his son, his _real_ son Daryl had marked Loki, leaving him with no pity, no sorrow for this _thing_ Stark called his offspring. Loki was pulled from his reverie when the baby started to cry. Loki looked at the clock. Thirty minutes till Tony came home to deal with this. Damn.

 

"Shut up." Loki growled at it making faivin cry harder. Loki pressed his hands over his ears. "Shut up!" The baby's cries persisted. Lokis is eyes flew open and trained on the child. he grabbed Daivin hard around the neck and lifted him off of the ground. 

 

"Shut up beast, þú varst aldrei ætlað að lifa"  tears streamed down the baby's reddening face as daivin struggled to breath. Louis hand tightened, squeezing into the child's neck, pushing harder and harder...

 

 _ **Crack**_.

 

Loki felt the child go limp in his hand and cold terror flooded him. He had broken Daivin's neck. He quickly dropped the child's body clutching his hand to his chest as if he had been burned. He dropped to his knees and gathered the now dead child to his chest.

 

"no, no, no, no, Fyrirgefðu, ég elska þig, ekki gráta, það er allt í lagi. Fyrirgefðu sonur minn. Daivin minn." 

 

 

 Loki clutched the lifeless form to his chest, sobs wracking his body. This child, _his child_ was dead at his hand because of what? Petty jealously, and grief for a child he never knew. Loki's high, keening whines echoed through the mansion, testifying horrific grief and rage. 

 

Loki sat on the floor with the child in his arms, his fingers tracing the curve of his cheek. The child's smooth skin was only interrupted by the shock of icy blue that went over his right eye, the gorgeous eyes (one scarlet) closed forever, and the angry mottled blue of his broken neck.

 

"Loki?" Loki hadn't heard the door open so it was a small shock to find Tony standing in the doorway. At the sight of his husband  he broke down all over again.

 

"Tony I killed him I did it I'm sorry." Loki words were slurred by his tears. Tony's eyes wondered to the lifeless child in Loki's arms, eyes finding the newly forming bruise along the child's neck.  Tony shook his head dropping to his knees.

 

"No, he can't be dead." Tony pried Daivin away from Loki's cold arms. As soon as Tony touched the baby he knew it was true.  Loki reached out, searching for the child but Tony shoved him away hard.

 

"get the fuck away from my son!" Tony screeched. "You already killed him, what else do you want? His blood?" Loki shivered violently.

 

"I didn't mean to, I didn't know." Tony sobbed over his son's body, not noticing Loki slip from the room.

 

"Jarvis total lockdown. Don't let that bastard out. Alert the team to get him to shield." A brief acknowledgement from the ai was all Tony needed. Tony sunk to the floor with his cooling child.  At a lost as to what to do Tony began singing.

 

Baby of mine, don't you cry.

 

Loki paced the room, panicking when he heard the door bang open.

 

_baby of mine, dry your eyes._

 

"I didn't mean to! I just tried to keep him quiet!" Thor hit him a crossed the head knocking him unconscious.

 

 _Rest your head, close to my heart_ , _Never to part_.

 

Loki was roughly shoved into the back of a van.

 

 _baby of mine...._.

 

_** * three months later. ** _

 

 

 Tony's walk was subdued as he entered the high security holding facility Loki was admitted to. A nameless agent handed him the key card he needed to open the door and left him alone. The room was dark save for one small light in the corner, illuminating a twin bed and blanket. The blanket shifted.

 

"Hello Stark" a raspy voice said from beneath it. Tony didn't reply With a pleasantry.

 

"Thor said you had something to tell me." Loki sat up then, the three months he had been gone had obviously treated him badly. Tony hated his heart for panging with guilt. 

 

"Yes, I must tell you the good news!" Loki's tone reminded Tony of a time more simple, a time before he had to attend both of his sons' funerals. 

 

"What" Tony ground out his head flooded with memories of the casket lowering into the round, empty of course. The body was cremated and put with it's twin. 

Loki's mad answering cackle was obviously pained. He turned his startlingly green eyes to his ex-husband. The orb conveying that this information would bring their fragile peace toppling down.

 

 

"I'm pregnant."

 

**Author's Note:**

> ..... I'm sorry.


End file.
